Thursday, July 14, 2011

The YOU Plan

My first blog post has sparked some discussions with friends about happiness and more specificly happiness when it comes to being in a relationship. Almost all of the friends I have talked to in the past few weeks have expressed to me that when they were younger they thought that they would be married with kids by their mid twenties. I think this is a common thought process for a lot of us. We think that we will have life all figured out by the time we reach our mid twenties, but the reality is life is a lot more complicated then we once thought as kids. Life is not a fairy tale, there is no prince charming coming to carry us away on his white horse. We often think that the perfect relationship will complete us but the truth is that that no one can complete us but ourselves.

I have so many beautiful, smart and amazing girlfriends that think something is wrong with them because they are still single. You know who you are, and this blog is dedicated to you! I completely understand the pressures that come with age and wanting to get married and having kids. I would be lying if I said I don’t sometimes think about it myself. The single most important thing us single girls (and guys) can do for ourselves is to just focus on you. And I’m not talking about this in a selfish way. I'm talking about investing your time in things that make you happy and work towards your life goals (i.e. career, fitness, hobbies etc.). When you are doing what you love and being yourself it will show. The authentic happiness vibes that you are sending out are very attractive because you are being yourself. So basically what I’m telling you is to stop looking for a man and thinking something is wrong with you because you are amazing! Just be yourself, it's as simple as that! OK it’s not exactly that easy but the point is that the most attractive thing about a person is when they are just being themselves. It's not the clothes your wearing or the shoes you have on, it's the confidence you are portraying while doing what you love.

When I was in college I fell in love for the first time. It was like nothing else mattered in the world to me except being with my boyfriend. Knowing that we were in love was the best feeling in the world and I couldn't wait to get married and have kids. I made a lot of mistakes in that relationship which ultimately caused our relationship to end. I was so wrapped up in being a part of a “we” that I completely forgot about myself. I learned a very valuable lesson: you can't love someone until you truly love yourself.

After that breakup my dad gave me one of the best pieces of advise: “Don't put all your eggs in one basket”. We all have different areas of interest in our lives; career, friends, family, love, hobbies, health, etc. When one is not up to par you have other interests to fall back on. And as I learned the hard way, when you put all your eggs in one basket (love) and it ends, you lose a lot more. As simple as this advise might sound I think people have a tendency to get caught up in certain areas of our lives and forget about others. The key to having complete happiness is balance.

When you fill your life (baskets) with great people, hobbies, and interests, you are setting yourself up for long-term happiness. It's not always about being happy in the moment, but more importantly it's about seeing the big picture of your life and appreciating everything you have going for you. When you fill all of your baskets so they overflow, you put yourself in a position to not only be truly happy yourself, but you have the ability to offer yourself to others. The more you have to offer others the more attractive you become. People are drawn to those that make them feel good and contribute to their lives in a positive ways.

I think that we sometimes lose track of the big picture if life. It's not about finding the perfect relationship but investing in yourself because no natter what is happening around you, you can always count on yourself. Don't get comfortable in life even if you have found the perfect relationship. Working on yourself and overflowing your baskets is only going to have a positive affect on both yourself and your significant other. And to take it a step further, if you are in a relationship that is not allowing you to invest in yourself, get out now! It's never too late. Having a wonderful relationship is just the icing on the cake, it's not the cake itself. Always invest in your own happiness.

Thursday, June 23, 2011

Making It Happen

Since this blog is about accomplishing my goals, it's time I get down to business. The first goal I am going to tackle is perhaps the biggest and most challenging goal on my list. Career.

After spending 6 years working in the field of marketing, I had come to the realization that marketing is not my passion in life. I always liked my job but I felt like I was just going through the motions and my heart was not in it. From the time I graduated from college I always pictured myself being in a career that I loved and could be successful in but I just never got to that point because I didn't have that passion about marketing.

Not only was I complacent in my career, I felt the same way about life in general and somewhere in between the ages of 27-29 I had become comfortably numb. Sure I had a job I liked, friends and family I loved, and great place to live, but I felt like I was in cruise control. I was choosing to live life on a comfortable level, so comfortable that I convinced myself at some point that I was really happy. After a few years of living in this comfortable zone I began to feel like something was missing in my life and that thing was passion. I knew I needed a change so I took drastic measures and moved to Colorado.

While moving to Colorado was a huge risk I jumped knowing that it was the right thing for me at the right time. That drastic jump was exactly what I needed to take control of the wheel again. Like most things in life my move to Colorado did not go as planned. I fell snowboarding and herniated two disks then spent 5 weeks on mostly bed rest and working from home. The straw that broke the camel's back was getting laid off from work. I was devastated! I had taken the risk and move to Colorado thinking life would get better, not worst.

The nice thing about being at rock bottom is that things can only get better and that is exactly what happened for me. I had moved to Colorado to find my passion and succeed in life and that was exactly what I set my mind to do. I was not going to let these events define my life, I was going to use them to motivate me. I took a real good look at my life and realized that it was my past actions that had gotten me to where I was. If I ever wanted to succeed in life I would need to start taking actions now so in the future I will be where I want to be. At that moment I swore that I would never take such a passive approach to life again!

So here I am today, taking control of my own happiness. Somewhere along the road of recovery I found my true passion in life and that passion is health and wellness. So after a lot of thinking and research I have decided to follow my passion and go back to school to get my masters in Health and Wellness Psychology. Happiness is not something that is handed to you, you have to go after it and create it for yourself. I feel like we were all brought into this world for reason or purpose and it is our responsibility to find that purpose. I believe that it is my purpose in life to help others reach their health and wellness goals. Life is not about settling with a job that you just like, it's about achieving and being all we can be.

I have always said that everything in life happens for a reason and I truly believe that I am right where I was meant to be. I had to overcome the obstacles in my way so that I could find the right path. I have never been so excited for the future. I finally feel like I have a clear plan on where my life is going and I am taking the wheel and driving full speed ahead.

Thursday, June 9, 2011

The Next Thing on My List (A blog about living life to your fullest potential)

As my thirtieth birthday approaches fast it has forced me to start thinking about what I want out of life. Life is way too short to just glide along hoping all your hopes and dreams fall into your lap somewhere along the way. I know that as I get older I think about what I would regret if I looked back 30 years from now and didn't achieve the things I once desired. Time flies as we get older and I am determined not to miss out on anything.

The best thing about getting older is that you also become much wiser. There are so many times I look back into my 20's and laugh to myself at the choices I made and the things I did. Not that they were all bad choices, but at that point in my life, it was the choice I thought was right. As I inch towards 30 I am much more comfortable with who I am both inside and out and the choices I make are in alignment to my core values. In my 20's my choices often seemed to be heavily influenced by the people around me. Now I don't care what others think. I only care about what is right for me. It's actually pretty freeing not feeling that pressure of pleasing others that we often do when we are younger.

Of course you can not have control of all thing in life, like when you are going to get married and have kids. But I have always believed that you need to work for the things you want in life. You have to make a commitment to yourself and most important follow through.

I am writing this blog because I don't want to look back with regrets. I have always had a strong desire to succeed in life and this is my commitment to myself! I made of list of things that I want to achieve in my life and I will be blogging about my journey through this list and my life. I would like to think of this list as a work in progress. Like myself, my list will always be evolving. You can do anything you put your mind to and this is my list of things I want to accomplish. Some are big and some are small but each goal fits into what I want out of life.

Write a Blog for a year

Make Health a priority

Take cooking classes

Volunteer my time to a non-profit for a year

Try Yoga

Go back to Europe and see 2 new countries

Take an Art Class

Take a Photography class

Become active in a Meet-up group

Show my parents how much I appreciate them

Surf a wave

Go to Hawaii

Read more (1 book a month)

Feel confident in a bikini

Become financial secure

Show more gratitude and appreciation to the people who deserve it

Play volleyball again

Drive down the 101

Buy a really expensive pair of jeans

Go somewhere tropical with white sandy beaches

Be very successful in a career I love

Go see Beatles LOVE Cirque du Soliel

Find true love again